Brother?!
It was a word Lucian hated to hear. Every time someone called him brother, they said it with distaste. It reminded him of his hateful brothers.
But today when Roshan called him brother, he detected no distaste in his tone. It was rather playful and for a short moment, Roshan felt like a brother.
Lucian shook his head in denial of his feelings. Why would Roshan feel like a brother? That man was annoying. Still, Lucian had to admit there was a sincerity in Roshan's eyes that made him feel cared for. Like an older brother caring for his younger one.
He shook his head again. Maybe he was being like this because he had always wished to be treated like a younger brother by his older ones. Brothers who showed him nothing but contempt.
He sighed frustrated.
"Is everything alright?" Hazel spoke next to him in a sleepy tone. She had her eyes closed in the darkness and was almost falling asleep.
"Yes. Everything is alright." He whispered.
She mumbled something and then fell asleep. Lucian studied her face in the darkness. He could still not believe that he was going to be a father. Of course, he was happy but he was also fearful. Now with witches and demons chasing him, he was afraid they would hurt Hazel and his child. That's why he finally decided to speak to his parents.
No, he wouldn't forgive them, but he was going to use them to protect his family. He was also going to work on learning his powers and becoming stronger.
Hazel turned back and forth next to him. She seemed to be having a bad dream. Lucian pulled her into his arms and eventually she calmed down and he fell asleep as well.
As usual, Lucian woke up early in the morning. Hazel was still asleep. Putting on some clothes he walked out to the garden. He loved early mornings when the sun hadn't risen completely yet, and the sky was painted with different shades of pink and orange. He liked the cold morning breeze and the sounds of birds singing. It was strange, he was drawn to the darkness yet enjoyed the colors of an early morning.
But who had come to disturb this peaceful moment?
"Your mother likes early mornings. She says it's the birth of a new day. After a long time of darkness, you can finally see the light. That's what she felt when she gave birth to you. That she finally saw the light and therefore she named you Lucian, meaning light."
Light? It was his mother who named him?
Lucian turned to his father. "I don't appreciate you coming here." He said.
"I thought you wanted to use me?"
Lucian clenched his jaw. "You owe me that at least. Don't you think?"
"I owe you more than that and I am here to give."
Then why didn't you appear earlier? Why didn't you give earlier? When I needed to.
Lucian wanted to ask all those questions but his father already knew what he was thinking. So if he wanted to give answers to his question he could, but he didn't.
"You can hate me all you want. I am not here to seek forgiveness." His father spoke. "I am here to be useful. I want to help you."
The thing was that Lucian wanted his father to seek forgiveness or at least explain himself. He didn't want to hate. He was tired of hating.
"Lucian." His father's tone softened which surprised him. "No explanation is good enough and I am not deserving of your forgiveness. I told you I wanted you dead. You are alive because of your mother."
Something felt strange. It was the feeling in which his father spoke. Lucian knew this feeling. He knew the familiar look in his father's eyes. He had seen that look a million times before, when he looked himself in the mirror.
His father was punishing himself by making Lucian hate him on purpose.
"You don't have to make me hate you. I already do." Lucian told him.
His father nodded.
"But I need you." He continued. "I want you to keep the demons away."
"You worry about learning your powers. I'll deal with the demons. No demons are going to hurt you or your family as long as I am here." His father assured.
"Good." Lucian turned his back to his father and went back inside. If his father was not going to explain himself or seek forgiveness, so be it.
Lucian dressed and prepared to leave for his meeting. He had a meeting with the tax minister and the finance minister.
"Your Majesty. If the poor pay less tax than the rich, the rich are going to stop supporting you." The tax minister advised.
"Tell me? The majority of people in this kingdom, are they poor or rich?"
"Poor, You Majesty."
"Good. What I need is the majority's support." Lucian said.
"But Your Majesty. The rich have power." The tax minister argued.
"Power in the form of capital is not what I need. I already have it. I need power in the form of community."
The tax minister and the finance minister looked at each other not understanding Lucian's logic, but they nodded in obedience.
"Just do your part. I'll deal with the rest." Lucian assured.
Once they left he proceeded with his other meeting. Before lunch, he had an appointment with Julian.
"Your Majesty. I see things are going well for you." Julian pointed.
"How are things going for you?" Lucian asked.
"Not very good. I have met a few covens and told them about you. They have a hard time believing that you are not siding with the demons, just because you are half-witch." Julian explained.
"Bring the leaders to me. I want to meet them."
Julian's eyes widened. "It's not safe to bring them here, Your Majesty."
"They won't dare to hurt me in my own home. Bring them to me." Lucian ordered.
Julian seemed concerned but nodded at last.
Speaking of witches Lucian thought of his mother. He had promised Hazel to tell her to stay so he went to the guest room where she has been staying. With the help of a spell, he learned from Julian he tried to summon her.
While waiting for her to come his hands began to sweat and his heart hammered against his ribs. He was nervous. Why?
"Lucian." She was here, calling his name in a way that made him feel weak.
Now he knew why he was nervous. He couldn't resist her. He wanted to be mean to her, he wanted to hate her but as he looked at her face, his mother's face all he wanted was for her to hug him. And why did her sad expression pain him?
"You came." He managed to say.
"Now that I can, I'll come anytime you call me."
Lucian's eyes darted around the room unable to look at his mother. "My wife would like for you to stay with her. That's if you want to." He said avoiding to meet her gaze.
"Of course. I would love to stay." She said with a smile.
Lucian couldn't deny the joy he felt that she was staying. He shouldn't be happy about it but he was. Bothered by his own feelings he decided to leave.
"Lucian." Her voice made him stop in his tracks.
He turned to her, "Yes."
Her eyes teared up. "Thank you." She croaked. "And I am sorry for being a horrible mother, and…"
"Why would a horrible mother name me Lucian?"
Lucian was surprised by his own question. It sounded as if he was defending her. Nyx seemed surprised as well.
"Lucian...it means light." She began. "I was right to give you that name. It suits you very well." She smiled sadly. "Your kind heart is the light."
"I am only being kind because my wife likes you." He said.
Was he convincing her or himself?
She nodded. "You love her a lot."
"Yes."
"Then I will take very good care of her."
Lucian nodded. "Make yourself at home." He said and left the room quickly.
Once he went back to his chamber he took a deep breath to calm himself down. He felt like his heart would burst. Why was he being kind to her? And those sad eyes of hers, they bothered him. Why was she hurting when he should be the one hurting?
The fresh scent of Hazel interrupted his thoughts. She came into the room, wet and wrapped in a towel with Ylva trailing behind. Once she took notice of him a frown settled on her face.
"You may leave." She told Ylva and then came to bed and sat next to him.
"What's wrong?" She asked.
Lucian shook his head. "Nothing."
"You look pale and…" She touched his forehead. "you are sweating. Are you ill?"
He shook his head again but he did feel ill. His mother made him feel defeated. He didn't know what to do. All the anger and pain he had kept inside, he thought he would take it out on her but instead, it was all still kept inside and it was suffocating him.
"Can you hold me for a while?" he asked.
Hazel leaned into him and wrapped her arms around him. Lucian buried his face in the crook of her neck, finding comfort in her sweet scent and the warmth of her closeness.
This woman, his wife, his life and his love. She was the cure to all his pain.