"Uh... long time no see..."
As the Aquarius Director left the Slaughter King Association meeting, Leon, who was pinned by the paw of an old acquaintance... or rather, an old familiar canine, was also trying hard to make his farewell.
"I’ve thought about it, and I’d better not disturb you from guarding the gate..."
Looking at the three dog heads the size of a round dining table above him, and feeling the deathly breath that blew over, Leon’s scalp tingled as he awkwardly negotiated:
"You know, it’s still working hours at the Clean-up Bureau. If I skip work without reason, our Director will definitely have a problem, so do you think you could let me..."
Before Leon could finish, the Canine Deity unhesitatingly rejected his request, then grinned and said:
"According to the rules of the Realm of the Dead, once you step through the gate, you belong to me! Also, don’t think about using the Scarlet Hair Lady to pressure me. Although I truly can’t provoke her, she wouldn’t dare to really touch me either.
Don’t underestimate me just because I’m the watchdog of the Realm of the Dead, but if I were gone, not only could the Evil God’s followers who steal souls come and go freely, but there would also be a massive influx of the deceased returning with grudges, causing chaos in the living world. Even as the Zodiac Bureau’s Director at the Clean-up Bureau, she couldn’t handle such consequences!"
"Ah, right, right, that’s the logic."
With his life and death controlled by... controlled by the dog’s mouth, Leon naturally wouldn’t stubbornly insist at such a time. Nodding in agreement with the Canine Deity, Leon, in his soul state, could only try to persuade:
"But even though you’re not afraid of her, there’s also no need to provoke her, right?
The woman and I over there, we were just tricked, our souls left our bodies and mistakenly entered the Realm of the Dead. It’s precisely your duty to guard the gate and prevent those who shouldn’t enter the Realm of the Dead from getting in, so... why not let us return?"
"Hmm, she indeed entered by mistake and can go back."
The Three-Headed Canine Deity glanced at the female journalist’s soul, then nodded and grinned, baring a row of interlocking sharp canine teeth, and said with a playful tone:
"But you can’t leave; you have to stay and reside nicely in my stomach~"
"Because you’re supposed to belong to the Realm of the Dead."
The Three-Headed Canine Deity said this while raising its enormous dog head, signaling Leon to look at the sky above himself.
"All normal living people’s Crows of Death Report should be resting at the entrance, in the Nest of Crows of Death Report. Once a soul enters the Realm of the Dead, its Crow of Death Report will wake up and guide it to the depths of the realm."
After saying this, and observing Leon’s slightly tense expression, the Three-Headed Canine Deity grinned with all three dog mouths and eerily laughed:
"The Realm of the Dead is a place that values rules. Every living soul should have a Crow of Death Report hovering above its head, which no one can evade, except in two situations.
One is if the person has successfully crossed the threshold to become a true god level, in which case their Crow of Death Report flies away early, and the other... is if they’ve long been dead but somehow escaped the realm again!"
Leon was all too aware that his soul was undocumented. Seeing the Three-Headed Canine Deity’s mouth growing larger and getting closer, with its paw pressing him so tightly he couldn’t move, Leon could only struggle to argue:
"Isn’t there a possibility... that I might actually be a True God?"
Amused by Leon’s words, the Three-Headed Canine Deity cackled twice, then extended three tongues of black, white, and grey from its mouths, each giving Leon a solid lick, while saliva flowed liberally like it cost nothing.
"You’re such an interesting soul. I reckon you’ll taste about as unique as a strange-flavored bean once I devour you. Now I’m really tempted to try you."
Damn, you’re really not picky...
Hearing the Three-Headed Canine Deity’s words, Leon, drenched in drool, shuddered not out of fear of being eaten but purely from the cold.
The saliva of the Three-Headed Canine, though clear and transparent without any suspicious colored particles, was laden with an intense deathly chill that nearly froze Leon’s soul solid.
"This... doesn’t seem quite right?"
Watching as the saliva, like a small stream, was licked away and as the giant dog mouth began to approach again, Leon, his negotiations failing, could only pray for the Director to quickly notice something was amiss and desperately stall for time:
"Strange-flavored bean... that’s like a snack... eating that isn’t good for your health, maybe... you should eat something else instead; could you let me go to the depths of the Realm of the Dead on my own?
Besides, as you said, the Realm of the Dead is a place that values... hsss... values rules, so by those rules, you should let me continue... continue onwards instead of eating me right away."
"Tch, why do you have so much to say?"
Seeing Leon shivering from the cold yet stubbornly refusing to accept his fate, the Three-Headed Canine Deity clicked its tongue, then said dissatisfiedly:
"My duty is to guard the entrance, preventing things that shouldn’t enter the Realm of the Dead from doing so and ensuring souls that belong here don’t leave. Souls like you, escaping, are the greatest disruption to my duty, and by the rules, I’m supposed to eat you!
Besides, I guard the entry to the Realm of the Dead and generally can’t leave, but as compensation, when I’m hungry, I have the right to eat any soul I fancy—this too is a rule of the Realm of the Dead. Today I eat you, and no one can say otherwise!"
Damn, looks like I’m really done for this time.
Seeing the Three-Headed Canine Deity intent on "sampling the flavor," regardless of anything he said, Leon could only wish he was there in body rather than soul, unable to make a mess in the deity’s mouth and give it a taste.
"Fine! It’s all about rules, right!"
Understanding that he was likely doomed today, Leon could only internally curse the treacherous Aquarius while glaring defiantly at the Three-Headed Canine Deity about to feast, gritting his teeth and saying fiercely:
"I’ll remember your rules! So this time I’m simply unlucky! But when you eat me, remember to chew me thoroughly; if even a fingernail-sized piece of bone is left, I’ll scratch your intestines apart!"
All three heads nodded simultaneously, and the Three-Headed Canine Deity, already impatient, opened its enormous interlocking mouth, ferociously sucking Leon trapped under its paw.
Just as Leon’s soul started faintly wavering, about to be "slurped" into the Three-Headed Canine Deity, a hand glowing with white phosphorescence suddenly grabbed out, seizing Leon’s rising soul.
Facing the intrigued stares from both man and dog, the female journalist with a blood-red antlered mark on her forehead stood shakily while clutching Leon’s soul-arm.
After vigorously pulling Leon back, with her soul tethered and seemingly on the verge of dissipating from the antlered mark’s tug, she managed to gaspingly speak out:
"Angsi, sir, if you want, you can eat me, I am willing to trade places with him!"