=HAILEY's POV=
I decided to visit Asher because I wanted him to talk from friend to friend. I wanted to ask him if he can forgive Ashley. I wish there was a way I can make for both of them. They've been a great help for me way back then. I owe them my life. If it weren’t for them I would be dead a long time ago.
I will not reveal the truth to Asher because I am not in a position to do that. All I want is for them to get along even as friends. At least that's it for now while they're still calming down. Maybe it's not unnecessary to ask for that. I know Asher is not bad, he just loved and hurt. I understood and I knew what he was going through was harder than what Ashley was going through. Because he had many unanswered questions and no idea what was happening.
I owe them what I am now. Ashley is the way reason I met Asher. Asher saved my life. They are both really the reason why I am still here and have given me new hope, new life. Without them, I would be long dead. So I want to pay them back even this way first.
I met Carmona in the hallway so I immediately asked if Asher was still inside. She said he was still there with Ashley. I walked quickly and wondered what else Asher had done to her. Maybe he's hurting Ashley again.
I open the door but could not continue when I heard them talking. I am intended to gossipping but couldn't help but listen to what they had to say.
"What if I don't want an annulment, will you force me? You will hurt me to sign? You will hit me over and over to force me?"
I can hear Ashley's voice and they're talking about annulment. It seems that Asher wants an annulment but Ashley refused. I can't Imagine Asher's feelings. Annulment is a very difficult decision for two hearts in love.
I experienced this when I filed with Hunter. If I was hurt somehow by what I did knowing that our marriage is only one-sided love. How more they are that they really love each other?
"No, I don't know. My mind changes when I'm drunk and I hurt you even if I don't want to. Forgive me because I'm carried away by my anger. The pain you gave me before always crossed every time I am drunk. I don't want to hurt you but I can't help myself."
I know that Asher is sick and he just isn’t aware of it. Does it make sense how many times he attempted suicide when intoxicated? The hurt that he almost kills the loved one but you didn’t want to lose. He's a doctor but doctors are also human with emotion and he is not aware that he is sick.
And his only medicine is CHANLEY.
Asher is even worse than Hunter.
"I don't want to, Asher, I don't want to sign that annulment. Even if you bit me again and again, I'll accept as long as you are with me. Don't go now, Ash, I'm sorry but I still need you." Damn, it looks like I want to push the door and go inside. I don’t know if I should mediate their conversation. I'm not in favor of them separating but even more, I'm not in favor of her being ok with Asher hurting her. Can't they be ok even if they're just friends while fixing things?
"Ashley."
"Am I selfish, Asher, if I ask you to stay by my side? I don't want you to lose my sight. Am I selfish if I ask you to sympathize with my grief when Charles leaves me?" I understand her. Charles's life is almost over and she needs Clifford now.
"Ashley, why are you doing this? Why are you torturing us?"
"Because I love you but I have an obligation to him. I love you and only you but I can't turn my back on him. I only have an obligation to him but you are the one I love. Only you and no one else. Will you agree, Asher? Will you agree? Will I be able to lean to you when he leaves me?" Finally, she also told the truth. What's true inside of her heart.
I'm waiting for Asher's answer if he's going to be angry or if he's going to laugh at Ashley for what she said. Who's stupid husband would allow himself to remain married to a woman he thinks has a hookup. Who is a fool to allow it to seem like you are still your wife's hook-up? You are the one she and want to be with you but she can't leave someone?
"Ashley,"
"Please, Asher, I'm begging you. Not now. Please, I'm asking you to stay, can you?"
I also waited for Asher's answer. I feel like I am also one of those who asked him. But Asher spoke what really came from his heart. A word that I even did not expect.
"Yes. As your husband or even as your friend. Where you are happier I will support you. Because I love you so much."
I didn’t even expect that and I couldn’t stop myself crying. I was the one who was hurt and happy with their conversation. I can’t explain what I want to feel right now. I want to come in and hug them both.
"Thank you, Asher,"
"Ashley," I heard Asher called Ashley's name but he paused for a while. What is he going to ask? "Once he's gone, can I take you back? Can you be my wife again?"
Seriously?
"Will you still accept me, even if I left you because of someone else? Even if I hurt you?"
"Yes, even if you repeatedly go with others, I will repeatedly accept you once you come back. I won't get tired of understanding you, Ashley. I won't get tired of loving you."
"Thank you, Asher." And I both them heard crying.
I left immediately and did not pursue my plan to enter. I left Asher’s office crying and headed straight to the parking lot. There I shed all the tears that I had wanted to shed. They love each other but something is stopping them.
Fucking fate.
They were ok and happy but why their fate wants to destroy them. I can't blame God. But I wish I had someone to blame for what was happening to them. I want someone to pile up so I can vent my anger. Well, it is human nature, right? Always looking for someone to blame to reduce the anger and pain they are going through. So I want someone to blame now for what happened to Ashley and Asher.
Charles added in the concern of Ashley because she could not introduce him to Asher. He would only repeatedly remind the two of what happened to Ashley. Charles has very little left in this world.
I know a mother's love. She is willing to sacrifice everything for her child. I know how painful it is for a mother to lose a child.
But God, would I be a sinner if I asked Charles to sacrifice and leave early. He is also set to die. Is it a sin if I ask to be early?
Ashley and Asher don’t deserve what’s happening. Yes, it wasn't Charles' fault either. But if he is set to disappear. Maybe God can just make it early. To end the suffering of my two friends.
The three of them are victims here. But the two are more victims because they have no other desire but to love each other and be together forever. They are not bad people, so why did this happen to them?
I am sorry Charles. I also lost a child even though one day I felt him with me. I am in was also because his father was the cause of his disappearance. But again, I hope -------- I hope you will leave so that my two friends can be together.
They deserve to be happy especially now and they even admitted they love each other.
Most people may not understand the kind of love the two have. Like I was then, not everyone could understand why I was fooling around with my love for Hunter. But this is our way of loving. This is is how we love. This is what real happiness means to us. Seeing our loved ones, staying with them, and be with them despite the hardship and pain. We feel all hardship is irrelevant as long as we only see them, feel the presence of the person we love.
People said that true love is to respect their decision. I agree with this.
But to let go of the person if he is no longer happy with you. Saying that they are happy when they saw their loved ones happy even though they are not the real reason for their happiness. This is stupidity, hypocrisy, and dishonesty of feelings.
Because for me, for us, is NO.
What is happiness means, if you are not with the one you love? The person you really want to be with? The person you want to smile at and tell your fun.
Everything is nothing and useless.
Love has no meaning if you are not with the person you truly love.
This is what love really means to us. To take all the risks and repeatedly hurt just to be with them.
And please, self-love is different from loving someone. So, don't judge if you haven't experienced true love.
Don't judge someone if you never walk in the path that they've been through, or if you never walk on their shoe.
Seat with them, have a cup of coffee, open your heart and listen to their story. Before you give a compliment.
My phone rang and when I looked at it, it was Eugen who called.
"Why?" I ask as answering his call.
"Am I going to kill this Kranky or am I going to wait for you?"
Kranky, the leader of those who abused Ashley?
My grip on the cellphone tightened and I felt like I wanted to teleport to get to where they were right away. At least now I have someone to release my anger. He is to blame for what happened to my two friends and if anyone should die it is none other than him.
"Wait for me. I'm coming."
'Just don't give him the wrong answer and this might be the first time I will kill someone.'