Totally focused on the path the car was taking on the road, I was. I couldn't dare say a word either. The fear of saying something embarrassing or stupid, which was so typical of me, was stronger than my willingness to ask questions. The mixture of anxiety and a strange fear of being inside that car bothered me and I moved constantly. Until biting my bottom lip bled.
"There! Damn it." I exclaimed softly placing a finger on the wound and looking at the small trail of blood.
"What it was?" He asked me looking at me quickly and returning his gaze to the road. He might just have a vampire's ears to hear whispers.
"Nothing. Just me biting my mouth until it bleeds." I answered like it was nothing and shrugged.
"Why do you do that? Do you like hurting yourself?" With his deep and silky voice he asked me turning into a street.
"When I'm nervous I have some bad habits." I spoke.
"So that means you're nervous right now." He said, making my face heat up. I swallowed hard not knowing what to say, it was a natural gift to get into tight skirts and not know how to get out of them, until I had no alternative but sincerity.
"Well, of course. I'm in the car of a stranger who purposefully messed me up and I'm not upset. Of course I'm nervous." I explained speaking a little too fast. I didn't want to look at him, I was afraid of what my treacherous gaze might reveal to him. But I heard him chuckling a little.
"To be honest, you're a pretty brave young lady. I could very well be a madman or a kidnapper, taking you somewhere unknown and doing whatever I wanted to you there." he said and my whole body shuddered. I swallowed with my blood icy in my veins. He was right, he could be, but I knew he wasn't. Or was it?
"You wouldn't dare... Would you?" I asked trying to do my best poor thing look.
"Relax, dear." He let out a loud laugh. I was angry that he was making fun of me.
"Look. I think you'd better stop the car here, I'll walk from here, you know." I spoke with a strange fear coursing through my body.
"Don't worry. I won't do anything bad to you, if you wanted to do it, you would have done it already." He shrugged.
"What do you mean by that?" I asked irritably. What did he think I was? A helpless little girl?
"You seem like a helpless little girl. Very naive by the way." He said with a mocking air. I felt really offended by that, and even more so that he was right.
"I'm not helpless!" I yelled at him. "And much less naive!" I continued.
"You are, dear." He spoke quietly. And that's what made me angry, his ease of berating me and always being right about everything.
"It is not me!" I discussed.
Since I was a little girl my grandmother complained that I was a child who cried a lot, and until that day I was still like that, I cried for everything and that wasn't on purpose, I was too sensitive and a higher tone or something I didn't agree with It made me sad and I cried about it. And I hated myself several times for being like that.
"Do you want to see what a helpless and naive little girl you are?" He asked in a whispery voice and stopped the car abruptly, scaring me.
"You are crazy?" I asked with my hand on my chest recovering from the fright.
"I'm crazy." he said and leaned over me in the passenger seat. His face was very, very close to mine at that moment.
Instinctively I closed my eyes and couldn't help but stare into those beautiful blue eyes that were making me breathless and dizzy. I breathed in the scent of him and felt drunk as if I'd been on some drug, my face and breath burning like hell as I felt his breath stray from my face and into my neck. It was there, in that exact moment, that I lost track of who I was.
I couldn't react, I seemed petrified by the charms of that god of beauty and charm. A new sensation began to run through my body, something I had never felt before. My intimacy heated and it was as if it had been dampened by his touch. I rubbed my thighs together trying to ease the pressure building up between my legs.
His warm, soft lips pressed sensually to my neck, which made me even weaker and more anxious wanting him to keep going and not stop, until the agony that was nagging me between my legs stopped. The final straw was when he squeezed my left thigh with his big, rough hand, it was as if my soul left my body and came back, it felt so good. Unable to stop myself, my lips parted and a stubborn moan escaped. Julian's lips trailed down my neck to my cheek, stopping at the corner of my mouth as his hand continued to squeeze and caress my thigh.
Suddenly he stopped, and I felt and strangely abandoned and frustrated. I opened my eyes slowly, and found that stunning blue, then I realized what was happening. He had just proved to me how vulnerable I was, how helpless and naive I was. The worst part was that I wanted to regret it, I wanted to hate myself for enjoying Julian's advance.
If he wanted he could have gone all the way with me, easily. But it had never happened, I had never felt that way with someone's touch. Not even when I kissed a boy for the first and only time, even though it was just a peck, I never imagined I could feel that with just one touch from a man.
At that moment I was feeling vulnerable and guilty. He had proved to me that I was weak and could never defend myself from an attack by a bad man. I wanted to cry, and go to my grandmother's lap so that she could stroke my hair and say that everything was going to be okay. But I wasn't.
"Why did you do that?" My voice was hurt and I really wanted to cry.
"I told you you were naive and helpless. I'm glad I showed up, otherwise something bad could have happened to you, walking around alone." He said settling himself in his seat. I was so sad but he was right.
I looked down, and held back my tears. Playing with my fingers I felt embarrassed. He must have thought I was just another girl, one of those teenagers who would do anything with anyone. But I wasn't going to bother explaining that I wasn't that.
"Please, can you just drive faster?" I asked still looking down. And I heard when he accelerated.
"All good." He said.
The rest of the way we drove in silence. It only took a few minutes until we arrived in front of my house.
"Thank you very much." I spoke hurriedly and put my hand to open the car door, I was interrupted by his hand at my knee.
"Just a minute." He said. "Take off your clothes."
"What?!" I exclaimed in surprise and fear.
"I mean, my suit." Corrected.
"Oh yes..." I breathed a relieved sigh. I carefully removed his suit and handed it over. "Thanks for bringing me, Julian. Bye." I said, still embarrassed by what had happened before and I got out of the car without waiting for him to open the door for me.
"You are a very fun person to tease, Eloise." He said and chuckled. I noticed that he didn't smile much, but what little he did was perfect. "Bye darling. And be careful with the maniac. I hear he loves pretty red-haired girls, just like you." Without waiting for me to answer, he started the car and disappeared down the street.
I didn't know him, let alone know anything about him. The only thing I knew for sure was that he wasn't normal, besides being the most handsome man I'd ever seen in my life, he was seductive and mysterious. My stupid heart was already racing and missing that presence strangely. I would never see him again anyway, and if I did, what chance would I have of a man like that liking me?
Sighing with relief, frustration, sadness and curiosity, I walked into the house.