Adam spent 50 caps at a restaurant for dinner that night. He chose to, for once, not eat at the food court and instead eat at a restaurant with outdoor seating on the tarmac with some potted plants and even a live band. He was once more paying for the experience so it was worth it. Though it was a shame he couldn't use the voucher he got from the layover it was still well worth the 50 caps.
Adam woke up the next day and checked out of his inn, spent 31 caps for breakfast, and then met Deccanus at the front gate as scheduled and both men set outside to go on, what Adam hoped, was a shorter run than the last few had been.
Actually, now that he had thought about it, he had gone to a vault full of literal horrors, Second Life HQ which was turned into a large raider compound, and a military FOB that still had active defenses. He was really not taking it easy recently, he truly did hope this run was a lot simpler than the previous ones had been, no big surprises, something easy to handle. Though somehow he doubted that would be the case.
On the way Adam explained to Deccanus the details of the request from Mr. Cantelli.
"If food is not reaching the city, that would indeed be a grave matter." Deccanus remarked after he heard everything. Adam nodded.
"Certainly. But I get the feeling it's less about the food and more about something else that he didn't tell me. I'm definitely not being told the whole story, but I don't get the feeling I'm being used, just being kept in the dark. So I think it's fine." Adam shrugged.
"I will trust your discretion in this matter." Deccanus replied. He then looked ahead and remained silent for a moment before finally speaking. "Recently I am… confused about certain things…" He admitted softly, clearly seeking advice.
"Oh? Yeah? What are you confused about?" Adam replied, equally soft, encouraging him to speak his mind, like yesterday.
"When I was in the Legion I was certain of our path… We were expanding our empire for the sake of our Caesar, and in return he protected us, brought us out from the filth, muck, and grime, enlightened us, and gave us purpose." He paused again. "We accomplished so much, building roads and homes, farming and trade, people were… thriving under his rule…" He looks down now, not sure how to say the next part.
"And yet there are people like that woman from before… the former slave, the ranger, and many others who do not look upon the Legion so fondly… I find myself… conflicted." He slowly turned to look at Adam. "Since I have left my home I have found so many that were opposed to our ideals, that did not like what we stood for, that would have resisted our actions. I always believed that the Legion was a force for good, bringing civilization to the untamed wastes, uniting the various warring tribes, rebuilding society… but now… I am not so sure." He said quietly. Adam paused, taking in his words as he contemplated them himself.
"And now you are worrying that all your efforts were for an unworthy cause?" Adam asked.
"Indeed." He returned. Adam sighed deeply and nodded while he gathered his thoughts.
"I think it's inevitable… that not everyone will like your country…" Adam said after a moment of quiet contemplation. "It's natural to make enemies… my country had annexed our northern neighbor, conquered our southern neighbor, and entered a war with a country across the sea. The Resource Wars caused my people to lose a lot of allies, a lot of friends. Other than the USSR no one was on our side… does that mean that the things I fought for were not noble?" Adam paused, asking himself as much as he was Deccanus. "Truthfully I don't know." He paused again as he looked at his gloved hand for a moment and then returned his gaze to Deccanus.
"What I do know is that the ideals I fought for were not wrong. I fought for the people who couldn't fight, I fought for my home town, for my parents, my cousins, my friends. I fought because there was a war and my country needed me…. We do not get to pick the wars we fight, Deccanus…" He turned to look him in the eyes now. "But we do get to pick why we fight, and who we fight for." He said resolutely.
"Was I wrong to fight for the Legion then? They raised me, taught me, brought me from the blindness of youth to the fullness of an adult. Without the Legion I would not be the man who I am and yet…" he paused. "I see people like that woman, who bears the mark of Caesar, a former slave, with such hatred towards my people…" He looked at the building nearby as they passed.
"When I was in the Legion these thoughts never once crossed my mind, there was nothing wrong with our way of life, no need to challenge these views. It was natural, human labor was needed to bring our civilization to greatness and yet… I find myself wondering if that was wrong…" He grew quiet again.
"I have my own opinions…" Adam said after a moment. "I think your people were wrong to use slaves. I'm sure the slaves would agree with me." Adam paused himself now to contemplate. "But in the Legion you were surrounded by those who were like minded, those who shared your views. Since you left you have a breadth of new ideas, new philosophies, new people to learn from… this is a part of growth, I think. We all learn from each other." Adam stopped them and turned to look at Deccanus fully now.
"There is no end to this journey you are on. This is just what it means to be human, we grow into new people everyday. But if you feel bad about your past actions, use the skills you gained to help the people in the now. If you question why others might dislike the Legion, ask yourself what it was they didn't like and why. Use those questions to inform your own future." Adam said seriously. Deccanus looked away for a moment as he considered.
"This is… complex…" He muttered softly.
"There are no right answers." Adam smiled softly. "Just do what you think is best, surround yourself with the type of people you want to be and you will arrive at the answers you want."
"How do you have so much knowledge, Adam?" Deccanus asked, looking at Adam again. Adam laughed pretty hard at that question. Deccanus frowned, almost pouted, actually. "I am serious." He said without batting an eye. "Only my Caesar or Legate would match your wisdom."
"Well that is some high tier flattery right there." Adam said with a smile. "But I don't have all the answers, just experience. I'm not a perfect man either, I got my own prejudices, my own vices, I'm not able to avoid failure. But I try. That is my answer. To try to be the best person I can. I don't expect to save the world, but if I can help I will. That's all I can do." Adam shrugged.
"A noble goal." Deccanus said in response.
"Maybe." Adam said as he sighed softly. "Maybe just self serving too. Salvatore, my other partner, used to scold me about it all the time."
"I do not think… It is a bad thing to try to be a good person." Deccanus said, thoughtfully. Adam smiled.
"Me neither. And I have no intention of stopping my attempts."