Chapter 133: Hopeless Obsession
But Sin also had its own advantages compared to him, all of its stats were far inflated than his own, not to mention any deep wound he inflicts only increases its strength more. Not only that, as it was a sentient being, it was slowly getting used to the runic eyes as well.
Axel was being pushed back slightly, since he could not inflict any serious damage to it. As a result, he was getting more and more reckless as well, his strength also increased with more injuries he received, since he now had the ‘Chaosblood’ aspect activated, for being in his 2nd aspect chamber.
But Sin had far higher base stats than himself, so their difference in power persisted, no matter how the situation changed. Sin spoke, “You can never defeat me, Tyler Cross, you can never overcome me, unless you accept the truth. Unless you stop hiding from your sins.”
“Accept it, Axel Nomrad, acknowledge it, stop lying to yourself,” the demonic phantom growled.
“The reason you always lust over Lumina, the reason you’re head is filled with lustful thoughts and the desire to hit it off with Lumina constantly, is because you want to forget it, you want to forget your past, avoid it. Erase it. But that could never be done.”
“Your obsessed feelings for your childhood friend Sophia, they never went away, even after death, even after reincarnation, even after transmigration to a different world, you can’t forget her, you can’t let go of your desire to possess every fiber of her being and own it.”
“Your love for her is too great, too strong, that it became your very undoing, which is why you were unable to ever express it to her; in the end, your obsession became too great, it was your sin. Accept it.”
With each word Sin spoke, their clash became more heated, and Axel continued to be angered from within him, ‘How dare this wretch talk about her? How dare it.’
“SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH…” he growled with a menacing fury that shook all of their surroundings.
“YOU KNOW NOTHING, DAMN FAKE” he roared at the face of the demon phantom fighting him.
Sin laughed hysterically, hearing that while amid the fight. Axel scowled at it. It spoke again in a sinister tone, “You were her only good friend as well. How would she feel if she knew that just like all the boys she hated her whole life, her best friend was even worse than them, his lust for her was far greater than all of them combined? How would she feel? How would she look at you?”
“SHUT UP, SHUT UP, YOU WRETCH.” he growled again.
But Sin continued unbothered, “Uh, I feel sorry for her to be honest, you saved her at the last moments but do you remember the last look on the poor girls face, you saved her, but she had no one, you left her alone, would she ever be able to recover from that trauma ever?”
“And you know, you will never be able to love anyone else besides her, no one, no matter how beautiful anyone else is, your heart doesn’t move seeing them, and you know it. You still love her too much.”
“The reason you always stray away from the valkyrie, or never look at her properly, no matter beautiful she is, because you know in truth, that despite beauty, despite how divine she looks, even that is not enough to move your heart, you were simply running away from the truth, and the fact she has the same name as her, from some twisted mockery of fate, it only makes the situation worse.”
“In truth, you fear both of the scenarios, not having any feelings in your heart despite looking at that divine beauty, or falling in love with her, a fake Sophia. Because you will find her overlapping with your childhood sweetheart, the Sophia you love.”
“But you know, she is not her, she was never her, and she will never be. I know you harbor a slight hope in your heart, she is an otherworlder, she could be, she could be from our world, from the earth, she could actually be Sophia, you fear that as well, it will break your heart more, when that slight hope is extinguished, or what if she actually is Sophia?”
“What if she does not remember you? What if she doesn’t recognize you? That is the very reason you always internally addressed her as the Valkyrie, trying to never use the name Sophia.”
Axel had stopped dead in his tracks by now, no strength left in his body, kneeling down all bloody, at this point, there was no mocking tone in the voice of sin. Instead, there was a tone of sadness, maybe even despair. It also stopped attacking him and only kept speaking, maybe it wasn’t just telling those things to Axel, but to itself as well. Because he was Axel as well, just a twisted version of him, that is.
It continued unbothered by the state of Axel or if he was even listening to his words or not. “You need to accept it, Tyler, please, you must accept the truth.”
“You will never see her again, you will never be able to tell her how much you loved her.” “And this intense obsession towards her will never decrease; you will never be able to love another woman, no matter how beautiful, stunning, or how similar they are to Sophia.”
Sin gazed back at his kneeling figure, seeing the same hopelessness and resignation as himself in the eyes of its original, looking back at him in despair. Sin shoved his hand right through the chest of Axel, and it whispered the words Drowning in despair, “The Valkyrie is not Sophia, she never was, and she never will be.” “We will never ever see her again, that is the truth, we need to acknowledge it, this obsession of ours will not lead anywhere, but we both know it….and it will remain forever, we must come to terms with it.”
Axel’s vision blurred, seeing that, his eyes shot wide open, blood gathered in his eyes, nose, and mouth as he spat up a large amount of blood. He hurriedly emptied his stomach, then gulped down potions one after another without stopping, until he finally felt somewhat better.
He entered the shower, cleaned the blood off himself, then simply let his body loose in the bathtub with no strength left in him, mentally or physically. His mind wandered to the words said by the demon phantom, how it spoke every word in despair, mirroring his own feelings to its deepest depths.
All those words, they were true, so very true, he couldn’t get over her, he couldn’t get her out of his head, which is why he never actively tried to think about her. Instead, he tried lusting over the other girls, maybe hooking up with some of them as well. In a way, he was using Lumina to see if she could generate that same feeling, boundless love in him, which would only be for her, maybe through which the obsessive feelings for his childhood friend Sophia would go away, finally.
50 GT 1 Extra CH 200 PS 1 Extra CH Magic Castle 4 Extra CH