*Jiya Pov*
‘Don’t do this’ feeling the conscious telling me I stopped the blade from cutting the nerve and placed the hand under water.
“You left me B. So don’t come into my mind like this every time.” I said angrily.
“You too thought to do the same right? Then why are stopping me?” I shouted, closing my eyes.
“He had hurt me B, and you were not there to protect me.” I said, kneeling down on the floor and took the first aid box along with me.
“Did you feel the same when you got hurt by your love? Did you decide to do this just like this for the same reason?” I asked into the air.
“I can’t bear it anymore B. I want to cry my heart out, but not a single tear is ready to come out. What should I do B?” I asked her even though I know I will never get an answer.
“I miss you B.” I mumbled to myself and drifted off into sleep leaning on the wall.
I woke up when I heard a knock on the door. I got up and walked towards it and opened the door.
“What is it Dad?” I asked him not caring to hide my hand.
“Dinner?” he asked, staring at my hand.
“I am not hungry.” I replied.
“You should take care of your health, Jiya.” He said when I walked outside the washroom.
“Don’t worry, Dad. I will be fine like always.” I said and did the band aid properly.
“You need to stop doing this.” He said gesturing to my hand.
“This is my freedom.” I mumbled and covered it completely with a bandage.
“Have some dinner, Jiya.” He mumbled and walked outside sighing.
I am such a weak person. How can I harm myself like this? I need to put an end to this. I am no longer a fool.
I glanced at the door and thought of having my dinner, but stopped shaking my head and lay on my bed.
Dinner! It was such a celebrating event for everything before, but now it is nothing less than a dreading thing for me.
#Past Beginning#
“Yes?” I asked him lifting my phone.
“Be ready by 7.” He replied and hung up.
I shrugged and got ready wearing my favorite dress in his favorite color. I used to hate black, but now it is my favorite color, and that is just for him.
I got downstairs to see my parents watching some movie. I bid my ‘bye’ but they just waved ignoring it making me roll my eyes.
“So what is special?” I asked him when he started driving.
“You will see.” He replied smiling.
“By the way there is something for you in the back seat.” He added and I immediately grinned, turning back to see a beautiful bouquet of red roses.
“They are beautiful Ajay.” I said smelling them.
“Just like you.” He said, and I blushed.
“Now, close your eyes.” He said, and I nodded closing them immediately.
“I thought you would ask me more questions before doing that.” He mumbled surprised.
“No!” I whispered because I will do anything he asks me to do.
He cares for me and shows that love which no one did, until now, except B. But she left me and she would have been so happy to meet Ajay.
Immediately few tears formed, but I brushed them away remembering how she always tells me not to cry like ever.
“We are here.” He said, and I opened my eyes to see we are near the outer skirts and near a cliff.
We both got outside and saw a table arranged for the dinner. I glanced at him and smiled with tears forming in my eyes.
“Come on! Don’t cry for this silly thing.” He said, brushing them away and we both sat down.
“I like you, Ajay.” I said holding his hand.
“And I like you too.” He said smiling.
“What did my brother said last week?” I asked him while having our dinner.
“Nothing!” he replied, frowning.
“Is everything ok?” I asked him.
“Did he say something to you? Like whether he liked me for you or something.” He asked back.
“He didn’t utter even a single word and again traveled for some other country.” I replied shaking my head.
“What?” he asked me shocked.
“Yeah! He said he will try to settle in that country itself.” I replied rolling my eyes.
“He can’t leave India.” He said frowning.
“Why can’t he? Did you guys planned to meet or what?” I asked him frowning.
“No! But he needs to be here with you right.” He replied.
“Don’t talk in circles Ajay. Tell me directly.” I said pouting.
“What I mean is if you have any special event in your life, then he needs to be here right.” He explained even though not clearly, but I blushed fully knowing regarding which he is asking me that.
I pushed my hair behind my ear and said, “Then he will attend coming here.”
Is he really thinking about our wedding? So soon? Well, it’s been a few months since we are dating, and I know full well that he is the one but is he thinking the same.
“This is the best dinner I ever had Ajay. Whenever I have my dinner from today onwards, this day will enter my mind.” I said when we both got up and hugged him tightly.
“You are too emotional Jiya.” He said releasing me.
“You don’t know how important you are to me.” I said, and he smiled back.
He dropped me at my home, and I walked inside fully on the moon. I lay on my bed with just his thoughts and drifted off into sleep.
#Past End#
That day I lay in my bed thinking how lucky I am to have him as my boyfriend. I thought I had done some good deed in my past life, but I never know I will think I did some bad deed, not once but many times to have him in my life.
Next day, I woke up with a headache and got ready ignoring it. When I reached the office little late than everyday, everybody glanced at me in shock.
“So Ms.Perfect secretary too can come late then.” My co-worker who is obsessed with me said walking towards me when I came outside the elevator.
“Good morning, Ms.Rose.” I greeted her and directly went inside the coffee room.
“This is the just third month of your employment, so be in your place.” She seethed and walked away.
I rolled my eyes and walked inside his cabin holding the coffee after knocking on his door.
“I apologize for the late, Sir. And I will tell today’s schedule.” I said, placing the cup on his table.
“Ok!” he said, and I informed him regarding his schedule.
“I made a decision to increase the salaries. Make a circular for it.” He said, and I frowned at him.
“But sir, just two months back the salaries have been increased.” I informed him thinking he forgot about it.
“I know that, but the companies are getting more profits and just do what I ask you to.” He said turning to stare at his system.
“Sure Sir. And sorry for stepping out of my line.” I said and walked outside his cabin.
I made the circular and passed it around the company building. In the lunch break, everyone was gushing how happy they are that the salaries have been raised.
Nonetheless, I am dreading it because if the salary is raised, then the pressure to talk to a good lawyer will be raised.
I didn’t let my worry show on my face as usual. I started having my lunch when few people sat at the table before me.
“Look, everyone is so happy for the salary raise except her.” Someone whispered.
“Does she ever have any feelings to even show this happy feeling?” Rose said smirking.
I rolled my eyes and continued to enjoy my food. They are behaving like I feel so bad hearing their words.
They don’t mean anything to me, and actually no one means something to me. Who cares about the people who don’t know how to even whisper?
“That’s why she is our famous Ice Queen Or Ice loser.” Rose said and that group laughed.
I looked up from my food and stared at them directly. When I did it for a few seconds, they gulped and looked away.
They don’t even have the dare to say something on my face. I shook my head and walked outside, leaving my food in the middle.
I sat at my table and looked at the flowers on the table beside mine. I shook my head and continued to carry out my work.
“Ok then! I will take my leave, but attend this gala for sure.” I heard a voice and looked up to see Mr.Mehra and some friend of his walking outside the cabin.
He then said, “And don’t forget to bring your beautiful secretary for the gala.”
“You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen.” He whispered before kissing my cheek, and I blushed at him like a dark-red tomato.
I shook my head to remove the thoughts because it is not a good time to think about them.
“I will not.” Mr.Mehra said, nodding and they both walked towards the elevator.
Mr.Mehra walked back and said, “This weekend on Sunday evening, there is a painting exhibition. Note down that and inform me, and you are required to attend.”
“But sir…” I started to say, but he ignored me and walked inside his cabin.
Sunday is the sole day I sleep without any break, but now I have to lose that facility too.
I have really done some bad deed in my past-life…