Rebecca’s story
The quickness with which he told me this made me realize he wasn’t kidding. He was still gazing into the distance over my shoulder. I could feel his heavy breathing in the back of my head. I twisted in his arms until I was facing him. My eyes begged for an explanation. Tears slowly formed and threatened to roll down my already burned cheeks. I wanted to keep myself strong, but the weight of what he had just said was pressing my heart so hard that not only could I barely breathe, but I was having a hard time making a coherent sentence.
I stood like a rock, motionless despite everything. Digging my fingernails deep into his arms, I was seeking support so I wouldn’t collapse. It must have been a few good minutes before I took my first breath and wrapped my arms around his neck. I bet he already knew my answer because he hugged me back. His hug was so full of meaning, love and warmth, but I also felt a little fear. Holding me closer to his chest was like he never wanted to lose me. That was the kind of fear I felt.
I raised my gaze, staring into his eyes, taking in so much air I felt like I was hyperventilating. Wanting to return to my hiding place, a warm finger locked my chin, forcing me to look again into his true eyes.
“Don’t look away, please!”
His words dug deep wounds in my almost healed soul. I wanted to run away not because I didn’t want to answer in words, but because I was afraid of how much I wanted to say yes! I figured it was neither the place nor the time for such big decisions. Bali was romantic, but here everything was happening so fast. I didn’t want to rush things. So, I kind of listened to my rational side and broke the embrace.
Saying no more words that really made little sense now, I left the cottage and ended up in the warm sand on the beach. It was late evening and the ocean waves were so calm. This stillness scared me a little. It was like the quiet before the storm. I threw myself on the sand facing the ocean. I expected its stillness to calm me, too. It was a risky attempt, but well worth it. The tears were now impossible to stop. I felt my face first warm with them and finally so cold from the wind that blew. It was as if they instantly dried on my face.
After a few more minutes of solitude, Dominic caught up with me. Or maybe he gave me some space to settle down and take it all in. “Are you okay, Rebecca?”
His voice was steady, without quivering. He knew that by saying this he had stirred up a storm in me that was hard to contain.
I turned to face him. He was there, lifting me up, letting me know that no matter what, he was there for me. I didn’t realize the exact moment when I stood up again, seeking comfort in his arms. My crying became frantic and my sobs were so thick that I started having trouble breathing in the air. It was a panic attack. Dominic realized the danger and tried to talk to me.
“Rebecca, calm down! Breathe slowly and watch my every move, please. Look at me! Look at me!” It was hard to look at him. I panicked, letting all my fears take over. “Breathe in, breathe out! That’s it!”
Feeling his warmth and caring, the danger passed in just a few seconds. But he continued to hold me even after that. I just laid there like an obedient child until the threat had passed.
“I am sorry…” I felt it wasn’t exactly the perfect answer, but I didn’t know what could be perfect now either. Perhaps perfect was the moment Dominic said that. Or maybe he said it without it being a question, but rather a sign that this is what I would have to do. And somehow that didn’t annoy me.
“You have nothing to apologize for, you did nothing wrong” For a few moments Dominic broke the embrace so he could look at me. “If I made you feel pressured, then I should apologize.” I immediately felt the need to banish that guilty thought from his mind.
“No, it’s not that. It’s just that I... never...” But the words wouldn’t come out and Dominic’s gaze was getting more insistent.
“Ok, just let us stop this, right now. I don’t want you to feel bad. We still have a lot to see here, so I will not ruin our vacation. Although, I really felt your answer even without you actually answering me,” And it really was true. No words were needed. Just our closeness was enough.
I stood in his arms for a few more minutes until I stopped crying. When he sensed I had relaxed, he cupped my cheeks with his firm hands. “I have another surprise for you, so we should better go to sleep. Tomorrow will be full”
I almost couldn’t sleep and the reasons were many. Everything that had happened in Bali from the time we arrived until now was taking its toll. I was feeling more and more confused and although I kept telling myself that Dominic was the right man for me, it didn't convince me as I knew the habits of werewolves, of marking their mate in intimate moments and so far, nothing had happened. We had made love so many times and he hadn’t shown the slightest interest in making me truly his. But what did I care about? Maybe he didn’t think I was ready for that yet. With this painful thought, I closed my eyes and fell asleep.
And it seemed like only a few minutes had passed since the morning sunlight was already bothering my eyes.
And once again Dominic wasn’t next to me, but there was the aroma of freshly roasted coffee coming from the kitchen. With slow steps and sleepy eyes, I followed the scent.
“Good morning, baby,” I said from the doorway. He stood for a while, turned to the counter, then looked at me. His eyes went hungry again. And it wasn’t for coffee. I was just wearing one of his shirts and his mind wandered to a territory only he knew about.
He hardly came out of the trance I had put him in without even moving an inch.
“Good morning, love! Come, I’ll make you a coffee.”
I approached, still lured by the fresh scent and also the second I walked past him, the attraction was all the stronger as his scent was more overpowering and it was enveloping me dangerously.
But I wasn’t about to fall prey to his allure again. I grabbed my coffee mug and stepped out into the cool morning air. Another gorgeous day awaited us. I already wished we’d never left this paradise.
“I love this place. Are you sure we can’t move here?” I asked him with a tight smile on my face, though a small truth lurked in my question.
“If that’s what you want, I can make it happen” It sounded almost like a promise, but it was difficult if not impossible to achieve. Our life was in New York. And what a life. Somehow, I had to get in touch with Logan. Fill me in with everything.
I smiled at him innocently and took another big gulp of coffee.
“So, what’s on the agenda for today?”
Dominic’s mood changed instantly, and a broad smile appeared.
“Another surprise, baby.”
I liked his surprises. But yesterday’s took me by surprise. I was hoping I hadn’t hurt him in any way. Luckily for me, Dominic never brought it up again.
Almost immediately after breakfast, we went down to the beach. The sun had become quite hot.
From the first day I set foot in Bali, I never expected that my life would take such a turn. I was not saying I didn’t love it. In fact, I adored it. This magical place, with this magical man by my side, is everything a woman would want for her existence. I felt loved and important to him. He would always put me first. With these thoughts in mind, in about one hour walk, we arrived in the most beautiful yet unusual forest I had ever seen, a forest where humans and monkeys lived in perfect harmony. I was speechless.
“Do you like it?”
“Oh, my goodness! It’s like the Garden of Eden”
“Yeah, and we are Adam and Eve”
I smiled at his remark. He was right. The forest was so vast and green, and these little guys were everywhere." Fear not, they are harmless”
“Well, if you say so...”
As I said that, I squeezed his hand tighter, so he pulled me closer while my anxiety visibly increased.
We spent over an hour in the forest watching the monkeys play around us. It was a wonderful spectacle of nature. Even more wonderful was that I could watch it with Dominic.
I didn’t even feel the time pass, and we were back in front of his house on the warm sand.
“We are back… home. If we can call it like that” I rolled gently in the soft sand just long enough to look into her deep wide eyes.
“Thank you, Dominic! I’ve been wanting to tell you this for a long time. Everything has been more than wonderful.”
“You have nothing to thank me for, Rebecca. You know very well why I do all this. Enjoy our last evening here. First thing in the morning, we have a plane back to New York. A lot of things will change when we get back. I can assure you of that!”