Lily’s heart skipped a beat. She hadn’t expected him to agree so easily. She reached for the bottle of shampoo, her movements slow and deliberate.
“How should we...?” Zayn gestured awkwardly, unsure of their positioning.
Lily pointed to herself, then in front of him, indicating she should move behind him. Zayn understood immediately. He shifted forward in the tub, creating space for her to slide behind him.
Lily’s heart raced as she slid through the warm water. Their skin brushed against each other, sending a jolt of electricity through her body.
Lily positioned herself behind Zayn, her back against the cool porcelain of the tub. Her bare legs stretched alongside his, their skin touching underwater. She tried not to think about how intimate this position was, how vulnerable they both were.
She poured a generous amount of shampoo into her palm and began working it into his dark hair. Her fingers moved in small circles across his scalp, gentle yet firm. She’d never washed anyone’s hair before, but tried to mimic how Martha used to wash hers when she was young.
Zayn remained silent, his shoulders tense at first. But as she continued, Lily felt him gradually relax under her touch. His head tilted back slightly, giving her better access.
From this position, Lily had a clear view of his back. Scars crisscrossed his skin, some old and faded, others still pink and relatively new. She recognized some as whip marks, similar to those that marked her own skin. Others were burns, deliberate and cruel. Evidence of the torture he’d endured during his enslavement by her father and brother.
They weren’t so different after all, she realized. Both marked by pain, both survivors.
Zayn’s eyelids quickly grew heavy as she continued to massage his scalp. His breathing slowed, more even. His shoulders began to relax. .com
“That feels...nice,” he murmured, his voice heavy with unexpected contentment. “No one’s ever done this for me before.”
The admission surprised Lily. Such a simple act of care, yet it was new to him. She wondered briefly about his past mate, Irene. Had they never shared moments ? Or was it too painful for him to remember?
She continued working the shampoo through his hair, thorough and gentle. Lily was so focused on her task that she didn’t immediately notice when Zayn’s head grew heavier against her hands.
It wasn’t until he leaned back, his weight suddenly pressing against her bare chest, that she realized what had happened.
He had fallen asleep.
Lily froze, unsure of what to do.
Zayn’s head rested against her collarbone, his back flush against her chest. His breathing was deep and even. His face relaxed in a way she’d never seen before. The usual hardness in his expression was gone, replaced by calmness.
She didn’t dare move. This moment of trust, however unintentional, felt too precious to disrupt. Instead, she carefully continued washing his hair, her movements slow and methodical to avoid waking him.
The water had begun to cool, but Lily barely noticed. She was captivated by this rare glimpse of Zayn without his walls.
Lily found herself humming softly, a tune she recalled hearing Martha hum when she was small.
The gentle vibrations in her chest seemed to soothe Zayn in his sleep, his body growing heavier against hers as he sank deeper into slumber.
Lily supported Zayn’s weight, humming quietly as the steam around them gradually dissipated. She studied his face, memorizing details she’d never had the chance to observe before. The small scar near his left eyebrow, the way his lips parted slightly as he breathed.
Lily felt the urge to touch his face. She lifted her hand carefully, shaking as she brought it close to his cheek. But before she could, Zayn’s eyes fluttered open, confusion evident as his vision refocused.
He straightened abruptly when he realized he’d been leaning against her.
“Did I...?” he began, turning to face her. “I fell asleep.”
Lily nodded, a small smile playing at her lips.
“I’m sorry,” he said, running a hand through his wet hair. “I didn’t mean to. I just... I haven’t slept well in a long time.”
‘It’s okay,’ she signed. ‘You looked peaceful.’
In truth, it was the best sleep Zayn had had in years. Even if it was just for a few minutes.
“Let me return the favor,” He said, looking at her thoughtfully.
Lily’s eyes widened in surprise.
“Your hair,” he clarified, gesturing to the shampoo bottle. “Let me wash yours.”
Lily nodded nervously. She knew she should have her guard up, but if even Zayn could let his guard down with her, she could do the same.
They carefully switched positions, with Zayn now sitting behind Lily. She pulled her long hair back, exposing her neck and shoulders to him.
Zayn poured too much shampoo, causing some to drip down her back. Lily couldn’t help but chuckle at his clumsiness.
“I’ve never done this before,” he confessed, his voice low near her ear. “Tell me if I’m doing it wrong.”
His fingers were strong but surprisingly gentle as they worked through her hair. What he lacked in technique, he made up for in attentiveness. Lily found herself leaning back into his touch, her eyes closing involuntarily.
As he worked, Zayn’s gaze fell to her back. The sight of her scars made his movements falter. The silver chain marks around her neck were still an angry red, a constant reminder of his cruelty.
Guilt washed over him. How could he have taken pleasure in her pain?
He finished washing her hair in silence, his thoughts heavy with regret. Instead of pulling away, he found himself wrapping his arms around her from behind, drawing her back against his chest.
Lily stiffened immediately, her body going rigid with fear. Her breath caught in her throat, memories of past violence flashing through her mind.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” Zayn whispered, his voice thick with emotion. He was genuine, she could feel it.
Slowly, Lily’s body relaxed.
“I...I’m sorry,” he murmured against her wet hair. “I wanted to hate you. I should hate you. But I don’t, and I don’t want to lose you either. What am I supposed to do?”
It was raw and honest.
Lily’s heart pounded in her chest. She felt the same way. Zayn had hurt her for the crimes of her father and brothers, things she’d never do. But she could not bring herself to hate him either.
She placed a hand on his arm gently, acknowledging his words. She gently tapped his arm, asking him to release her. He did immediately, giving her the space she needed.
Turning to face him in the tub, water rippling around them, Lily began to sign shakily.
‘We don’t have to hate each other,’ her hands formed the words carefully so he would understand. ‘And we don’t have to love each other if we’re not ready.’ free.w e bn.ov(e)l(.)com
Zayn watched her hands intently.
‘I accept your apology,’ she continued, ‘but words cannot erase pain, just like you can’t erase the pain you suffered.’ Her expression softened slightly. ‘But we can start healing together by trusting each other.’
The weight of her words settled between them. Zayn held her gaze, searching her eyes for any sign of deception. There was none. Lily was the same as always. Genuine and honest.
“Together,” he agreed, his voice barely above a whisper. “We can heal together.”