Caspian was wide awake the moment the door opened the next morning, his lips turning down when he felt Asher kiss his hair.
He opened his eyes and stared into unfamiliar hazel-gold eyes, searching desperately for the man he fell in love with.
"Go back to sleep," Asher said like he always did, already disappearing through the doorway.
"Asher," The Alpha’s name was a plea, his pitch barely higher than a whisper.
Caspian stared up at the ceiling but that didn’t stop the tears from spilling into his hair.
He would prefer that Asher just send him away, that would hurt less than being here to watch them go back to being strangers.
It wasn’t Asher being busy that bothered him, that had never bothered him before. It was that Asher was a completely different person...
If the Alpha was trying to get him to leave... then Caspian would do that.
He didn’t have enough fake smiles left in him, even walking over every inch of the private woods wouldn’t be enough to make him feel better.
Caspian sank his fingers in his hair, his nose bright red from tears, the room filling with the scent of sickly sweet, wilting violets.
He closed his eyes tightly to keep the tears in, he didn’t know how to cry without hiding in Asher’s shoulders.
So what was he to do when the Alpha was the reason for his tears?
Caspian had begun to cultivate a habit of forcing down food, so even though he had zero appetite, he still ate every bit of his breakfast.
He still very much planned to go swimming, then when Asher got back from work, he would tell the Alpha he was leaving.
That should make him happy, it was what he wanted after all.
Caspian’s thoughts were screaming in his head, and he didn’t listen to any of them, because if he did, he knew he wouldn’t leave until Asher told him to - no matter what happened.
So a few hours after breakfast, he was in the backseat while Peter drove, Keith taking the passenger seat.
He didn’t bother calling to say he was going swimming, Asher and Jael already knew, and his bodyguards would give a report regardless.
As Peter found a place to park, Caspian stared at his nail polish which had deteriorated further, absently reminding himself again to put on a fresh coat.
Keith held his pool bag as they walked in, people barely paying attention to them.
There was an indoor pool, as well as an outdoor one. The weather was really pleasant so most people were outside.
It was bustling without being overcrowded, and there were two smaller pools for kids and teenagers.
Caspian didn’t protest when Keith and Peter hovered as close to him as they could, leading the way back to the pool after he changed into his swimwear.
He was wearing the pink version of the swimsuit he had tried on the day before, comfortable shorts on as well.
"You know you can swim if you want to," He offered to his bodyguards who at least tried to dress more casual today.
"Guns and water don’t go well together," Keith said bluntly.
Caspian already knew what their response would be, "Fine, fine. I’ll be in the water if you need me."
While Caspian walked over to the ladder to get in, Peter and Keith set up a pool bench for him, waiting patiently for him outside the pool.
Caspian smiled at the pleasantly warm water, someone jumping in from a board, at the other end of the pool.
He dunked underneath the water, his hair already damp from taking a shower earlier.
Caspian popped out of the water and pushed his wet hair out of his face, staying in the shallow end so he could talk to his bodyguards.
"The water is really refreshing, you’re missing out." He taunted them, resting his arms on the edge of the pool.
They both kept poker expressions on, completely unfazed.
Caspian eventually moved away, floating peacefully through the water while he tried to remember how to swim.
He really wanted a friend... Someone he could do things like go swimming with, someone he could tell his troubles to.
He used the edge of the pool to get around as he got to the deeper end of the pool, losing his balance when he tried to move too fast.
"Careful," Someone caught him with a single arm.
Caspian had gone under when he slipped so he spluttered and gasped as he got the water out of his eyes.
"Thanks," He said gratefully, regaining his stability, "I’m a little rusty with swimming."
"Want me to coach you?" The stranger offered.
Caspian got a good look at him now that his eyes were no longer stinging from the pool water getting in them.
It was a really young, athletic-looking Alpha, complete with bleached blond hair and perfect white teeth.
"I’m one of the lifeguards so you’re in safe hands." He added, lifting up a plastic name tag.
Caspian waded to a shallow part of the pool so that he could stand on his feet again, noting that most of the lifeguard’s torso was out of the water while he was still neck deep.
"I’m not worried about that," Caspian pushed his hair back again, "I just came to relax, I’m not exactly eager for swimming lessons."
"Fair enough," The lifeguard grinned, "I’m Brad by the way, and I could get you a pool tube so you don’t have to worry about drowning."
"Thanks, I’d really appreciate that. And you can call me Caspian," He added as the lifeguard hopped out of the water with ease without needing to use the ladder.
He only wore red shorts, powerful shoulder muscles rippling as water cascaded down his tanned skin.
It was only when Brad walked off that he remembered his bodyguards, they had sunglasses on but Caspian knew that they were staring right at him.
He gave them a thumbs up regardless, just to make sure they didn’t jump Brad who was just being nice.