"Haha, a big-breasted beauty huh? A runaway princess is it? At least she can entertain us. If she boards, she'll get run over by a truck," Morrison dropped this bombshell remark.
"Ah, the classic 'broken engagement' trope," Shadi said helplessly. "Truly the Connector Immortal, reversing life through nine reincarnations, using his body as the seed, proving the Dao through connection. At the end of the immortal path, who stands supreme? All bow before Micah's presence."
"Chapter One: The Fallen Genius! Pirate Power! Level Three!" Ren joined in the mockery, adding: "Genshin Impact of Battle Qi, activate!"
"Fast forward to killing the sister to prove the Dao."
Ox closed his eyes. These idiots clearly needed some real work, otherwise they'd forget their own names. If bounty hunters, navy, or the Thieves' Guild came knocking, how would they fight?
Even Li Site, who started this mess, couldn't take it anymore. Each one was more absurd than the last, dragging the already disreputable pirate profession to new depths of infamy, elevating piracy to evil heights it never deserved.
"What kind of compilation is this..." Micah was done.
"All is ruin, forever lost my love... Revive! My beloved!" Wolman suddenly shouted.
Instantly, complete silence fell over the room, everyone staring dumbfounded.
After an excruciating ten seconds of pin-drop silence:
"Whoever we're picking up, shipping goods is easy enough. Just a boat ride. I thought it'd be some big job," Archer said, seeing another profitable venture. Some sucker was paying - why not?
"If it's picking someone up, the final payment comes at the end. There are many factors - not just escorting along the way, but also the handover at the destination. We might even need to arrange their reception. Too many variables - that's what makes it difficult."
"What's so hard? If things go south, we kill them midway or sell them as slaves somewhere. Could even hold them for ransom," Archer said dismissively, stubbornly showing off.
"Lord Archer's wisdom shines as always," Ren mocked. If it was really transporting someone important, would they entrust a weakling to you without at least two or three bodyguards capable of holding their own against their crew? The lord was surely smarter than them, or he'd have been torn apart in the nobles' thousand-layered schemes long ago.
"They said we can bring two people. Have you decided who?" Fen asked Li Site.
"Isn't it obvious? General Fen and Kill-brother of course. If things go wrong, we'll need backup," Li Site answered without thinking, bringing along the human rights card and overpowered card. Otherwise they might not return alive if negotiations went poorly.
"A family banquet, how fancy. Since it's nobles, it's probably just an orgy," Morrison remarked casually.
Fen spat out his tea. This guy could drop such bombshells with a straight face.
"Enough of this. We'll know tomorrow night anyway. By the way, I was too busy yesterday and this morning - take a look at this." Fen took out a newspaper bought from the Adventurers' Guild, wanting to educate these illiterates about current affairs instead of learning meaningless abstract quotes from Li Site that were rotting their brains.
The crew passed around the newspaper.
"Carriage..." Ren narrowed his eyes. "The Arlan people believe the origin of all universal laws is the carriage. These two characters hold secrets. Does a carriage have horses? Carriage..."
"Alright alright, spare us your wisdom. I get what you're trying to say," Li Site quickly interrupted.
Wolman, the famous anti-Arlan fanatic, was thoroughly amused.
"How generous of the Arlan people - they don't even have horses themselves yet entertain the masses." After this quip, Wolman read carefully. When he saw this invention could quickly transport goods and even people, his nictitating membranes blinked rapidly, his long forked tongue flicking in and out.
After a long pause, he finally said: "The Arlan Empire is doomed."
Passing the newspaper to the next person, he continued: "I know you're an anti-Arlan fanatic, but putting facts aside... no, focusing only on facts, why are they doomed?"
Li Site was speechless.
Before Wolman's homeland, the Mongus Wetlands, became an autonomous region, life was decent despite needing occasional raids. After the Emperor's massacres, the Malthusian trap was solved by reduced population, but life became harder.
Autonomous regions and principalities sounded nice, but were essentially the same - you could have autonomy, but just a tiny bit. You handle all the local messes while they take all the benefits.
Wetland specialties had to join free market trade. To develop the wetlands for human habitation, a corvée system was implemented - every adult male dragonkin had to provide three years of unpaid labor. In two words: worse than prison.
This led to the Wetland Rebellion years ago. The benevolent ruler squeezing blood from his people fought the rebels, with Wolman as a rebel officer. Initially successful against paper-thin defenses, the ruler simply called in Arlan troops, crushing the rebellion within a month.
Having already lost his country once over a decade ago, Wolman despaired completely, seeing no hope for restoration, and fled overseas.
Wolman began: "The Arlan Empire seems to keep winning, and indeed keeps winning. But world trends depend on identity and ideology."
"He's turned the entire nation into a war machine. Each overextension requires conquering more to recover. Excessive military budgets elevate soldiers' status endlessly. The increasingly powerful military faction pushes the Emperor to keep conquering to maintain their influence and position. Even if the Emperor wanted to stop, he couldn't - he's become a puppet of conquest itself."
"Yes, the Emperor keeps winning, but only postpones the crises buried by each overextension through foreign aggression. Beneath Arlan officials' high benefits lies endless hatred from other Western Continent nations."
"Once railways are built - and they must be - connecting the entire Western Continent, the Emperor's military prowess would easily conquer it all."
After Wolman's speech, Li Site forced a laugh.
"If the Emperor conquers everything, already chatting casually about game over, how can it collapse?"
Li Site thought Wolman had gone completely mad, like the Church's ultimate fanatics.
"Precisely because of this, Arlan will collapse - catastrophically. Only a few nations like Zeon, Pedan, and Greig remain, with Losterra being the toughest nut. With most of the Western Continent conquered and railways connecting it solidly, forming an iron bloc."
"Now if someone tried rallying Zeon and Pedan against Arlan, they'd refuse out of self-interest until destroyed. Even if someone miraculously formed an alliance, mutual distrust would ensure defeat."
"Destroying these nations would be easy, until the Emperor rules the continent. But once everyone becomes Arlanese, who gets the high benefits? The war machine must keep running for the original Arlan elite and military, requiring continued expansion through different means - with conquered peoples still subjected to corvée."
"If the Emperor purged his military, now the dominant power, he'd face backlash accelerating Arlan's collapse. He's completely trapped."
"The moment the Emperor achieves hegemony is when destruction comes. Under corvée, rebellions would arise but remain disorganized - unless former royals are rallied to besiege Arlan, detonating all buried crises."
"Arlan might collapse before full conquest, if enough territories are taken with enough corvée laborers. I told you - world trends depend on identity and ideology."
"Arlan remains strong, but we can lose countless times. Arlan can only lose once. Just once means catastrophe."
"The faster railways are built, the better - since it's not just the Emperor who'll benefit. Without railways, this would just be delayed by decades. I never thought I'd see the day... but it's coming soon."
After Wolman finished, everyone was stunned. This big dark guy actually had such profound insights.
Fen narrowed his eyes. While not entirely correct, Wolman made good points. Wolman didn't know about Cloud yet - the Emperor was already reaching for the Beima Principality. Another massacre would mean corvée for sure.
"You've outdone us all with your cabin wisdom," Li Site said dumbfounded. Wolman, aka Little Zhuge.
"What a... moderately educated historical analysis," Ren remarked admiringly. "Truly one of the ship's two educated men."