It is annoying how people barge into your home unannounced.
I mean, this is not a public place where you can just show up whenever you like.
I never wanted visitors. I am not a people person.
I was once, but life has taught me a harsh lesson early in life.
But… but… I love this Blackforest!
“I see you still love it,” James said to me while smiling from ear to ear as if he won a lottery.
I nodded slowly, trying to keep the tiniest level of dignity I still have for this day, but the word “still” is something that I can’t let slide.
“still?” I asked, confused. James just smiled. I looked at him for seconds, waiting for some sort of confirmation, but I got nothing.
“Have you seen me before? Like, before being my editor?”
“Not sure, I may or may have not. It depends on how you might look at it,”
“What the heck, It is as simple as a yes or no. You are making it complicated,”
“I might or might have,” James looked at me with pitiful eyes as if he wanted me to recall something. But no matter how I tried, I really can’t remember it. What am I missing?
“Just forget about it.” He winked. “We just met each other, briefly, so brief it might not be worth remembering… for you,” He whispered the last words, and I almost did not hear it.
Time passed by so fast as we talked about the movie and other professional concerns we had. James and I argued whether to let the scriptwriter drop an original character from the book and how the main character’s characteristics should be changed a bit. My novels are my babies, and I would not want my babies to get dropped or altered somehow. I want them to stay the same. James argues about contracts and how it would be better selling, more relatable- at the end, we decided to just have another meeting as if something might change my mind before another schedule.
“I will see you next time,”
“Yea, but I hope it would not be here,”
“It wasn’t my fault in the first place, haha.”
We both laughed at the idea. I think we both remembered something unpleasant for me. James cleared his throat. “Do you want to grab dinner somewhere?”
“Sure,”
“Great,”
“ Just give me five minutes to change.”
“Go ahead, I’ll wait in the car,”
“Okay,”
I walked towards my room, into my closet, grab a random hoodie and jeans. I was about to change my clothes when I realized what I was wearing tonight all this time!
I walked towards the mirror, shocked that I have been just wearing loose white long sleeves and shorty-shorts. It bothered me so much that I did not bother to button the top three buttons and thought I should have listened to Kyle when he told me that I should change because someone might pop out of nowhere.
I walked back and forth inside my room, trying to recall James’ reaction, and one by one, all of his actions throughout the meeting made sense. Now I just understand why he seemed to look away most of the time during the meeting. His quick stolen glances here and there.
“But why he did not say anything?!” I blurted in thin air. I covered my mouth after saying it, afraid that James might hear it, which is a little impossible because it was not too loud to reach him outside of the house.
“Maybe he did not want me to be embarrassed? Afterall he caught me in the most embarrassing situation anyone can be in,”
“Ahhh! Whatever! I keep on talking to myself like an idiot!”
It took more than five minutes to get out of my room, not because of picking what I should wear but because of thinking how stupid I had been today in front of a person I had met recently.
“I booked a good Chinese Restaurant near here. I hope you like Chinese,”
“I like it, the food, the drama, and the actors,” I said jokingly.
“That’s too much information,”
He laughed.
I laughed.
It is such a comfortable ride; I really have this feeling that I have seen this man before. It is really bothersome when memories are hard to recall.
“Can I ask you a question?” James said, breaking the silence as we waited for our food to be served.
“Sure,”
“Kyle,”
“What about him?”
“Is he your….”
“My what?”
“I mean, you know… I am not sure how to ask this. I might be stepping some boundaries here,”
“My what? It would be annoying if you would stop there,”
“Boyfriend?” He whispered. Bowed his head and then looked away. I am not sure if my mind is tricking me, but I saw a sweat rolled down his forehead, and he seemed really uneasy while waiting for my answer.
I am used to this kind of question. I get this a lot. I mean, Kyle is an illegible bachelor, and I am not doing that bad on my own- modesty aside, people are really wondering about our score.
I just smiled. I usually just shrugged on these questions, but I find this guy’s reaction not only weird but funny at the same time, so I decided to play with him a bit.
“Yea, he is .”
James looked as if he had been poured with ice-cold water.
And I laughed. It looks funny and adorable at the same time.
“I mean, he is a guy and a friend. I think the term a guyfriend would be more appropriate, but he isn’t even a guy, hahaha, “
“What do you mean?” He has this expression of relief first then followed by confusion right after I finished my sentence.
“Secret, I will tell you when we get closer,” I told him after I slurped the noodles we ordered.
“Oh, so that means we are not yet close,”
I did not answer.
James is a good listener. I think it is a common trait of people who are great speakers as well. I noticed how well he provided a presentation when we had our first meeting for the movie. Now he is listening to me, not pretending but really listening as I tell him my insights about things and some nonsensical concerns that I sometimes have.
He is such a good listener that it is easy to overshare with him – that I think is a mistake that I would regret in the future.