She wanted it. And as for Julian, he could be a jerk, but she knew he would make a wonderful father.... If he decided that he wanted to be involved of course.
When she had left the doctors office she'd been scared... But at a point she had been ecstatic at the idea of becoming a mother, of holding her tiny baby in her arms. Purposely ridding herself of her child was unthinkable.
“Call me if you decide to go through with it” Camille had said. “I need to know what you intend to do as soon as possible.”
The rest of the day Nina's emotions bounced between fear, hope and despair as she remembered her doctor's words the previous day.
“You’re definitely pregnant,” he had said.
Nina stared out the window. Those words had changed a lot for her. Made her realize that she had something more important to worry about now than the crap people were saying about her... And her family.. Her father and brothers.. What would they think? What would they say?
She’d never been more afraid in her life, never wished that Julian was by her side as much as she did now. But, despite her fear, she knew she would do everything in her power to protect this baby.
“I insist you see an obstetrician,” her doctor had told her “Shall I arrange it?”
She had taken a breath and let it out slowly. “Please.” She had said.
She did the same thing now as she sat in her office. She'd get through this. Somehow.
---------------------------
"I have a question for you" Nina said to Abby as she joined her in the sitting room. It had been four days since she found out that she was pregnant, and it was eating her alive that she couldn't... Or hadn't told Abby about it.
Abby was her best friend, they told each other everything, and she knew if anyone was going to be understanding and be by her side as she went through this, it was Abby. But it would be easier to tell Abby about it if the man whose child she was carrying was not her brother. But now she couldn't keep it to herself anymore. She felt as if she was betraying her best friend by keeping it from her.
"Spill it" Abby said as she dropped her wine glass and her phone on the table in front of her, and diverted her attention to Nina.
"Wow." Nina said. "You are so eager to hear the latest news, aren't you? Such a gossip" she said playfully.
Abby raised her hands. "Hey, I was sitting here on my own. Minding my business and you came to talk, so sit down and spill it"
"Fine," Nina said and took a seat.
"Wine?" Abby asked her, pointing at the extra glass on the table, but Nina shook her head.
Abby frowned. "That was weird. Since when do you decline a drink?" she asked, when Nina didn't reply, she shook her head and said, "Never mind, go on. What were you going to tell me?"
"Actually I was going to ask a question," Nina said.
"Shoot"
"So there's this girl.... At my office"
"Is the girl you?" Abby asked abruptly, making Nina jump a bit.
"What? Why would you ask me that?"
"Oh, because if I wanted to ask an embarrassing question or if I wanted to ask for advice, and I didn't want anyone to know the question was about me... I would go that way too... Asking like I'm 'asking for a friend'" she added air quotes as she said the last sentence, making Nina hate that she was right.
"Well, I'm not you. Do you want me to ask the question or not?"
Abby laughed. "I'm sorry, please go on"
Nina sighed then continued. "So this girl at work got pregnant for the boss..."
"Oh that's bad" Abby said, giggling and picking up her wine glass again.
"Yeah it is," Nina agreed. "Anyway she's worried about a lot of things... Like how it's going to affect her life... Her job... Her future. What her over protective family is going to think. What the father of the baby is going to say? How he's going to react. Would he even want the baby? We all know bringing a child into the world comes with a lot of responsibility... And this wasn't even planned. She doesn't even know if the guy is going to want the baby. What if he doesn't want it and she has to do it all alone... Would she be able to handle it, being a single mom? It's not as easy as it seems. Or what if he wants the baby? Would it make everything easier? What if he tries to take the baby away? Well I'm sure that won't happen because even now he doesn't want to have anything to do with her and she's so scared to tell him... Or anyone... about it for that matter.... "
Nina didn't realize it, but somewhere during her rant she'd let her feelings overwhelm her and when she finally stopped speaking, she was crying hysterically.
Abby was at her side in an instant, wrapping her hands around her." It's okay, dear, "she said soothingly. " Please stop crying"
Nina managed to pull herself together for a few seconds but when Abby asked quietly, "The girl is you, isn't it? Are you pregnant?" She was crying like a baby all over again.
"Yes" she said, barely able to recognize her voice. "It's me. I'm pregnant Abby. It's Julian's, and I don't know what to do or think"
"It's going to be fine, and you are not alone. You have me here with you, remember? Honestly I'm a little mad at myself that I didn't notice at all that something was bothering you" she lifted Nina's face and cupped it in her hands. "I mean look at you, you look so worried." she laughed. "I knew something was up when I offered you wine and you said no"
Nina smiled through her tears. "You really think it's going to be fine?" she asked.
Abby nodded and Nina sat up. "So," she began, "How do you think I should tell Julian about it? Honestly I wish I didn't have to, especially with all the drama that has been going on between us recently, but I have to... So how do you think I should do it, on the phone? in person? Maybe just drop by his house, drop the bomb shell and just disappear from the face of the earth"